Top Ten Things To Do With Leftover Thanksgiving Turkey

ethan holmes turkeyHappy Thanksgiving! So ya bought a thirty pound bird at the store because “it was such a deal, only eighty nine cents a pound!” Unfortunately only five people showed up for Thanksgiving dinner and three of them had already eaten somewhere else. Even the homeless guy at Walmart doesn’t want any more. Now you have gobs of leftover Thanksgiving turkey. What to do…what to do.

Fortunately, Ethan Holmes is here to save the day, or the week.

Top Ten Things To Do With Leftover Turkey

10- Drop it in the blender and make a smoothie.

9- Pack it for lunch for the next 32 days until you start growing feathers.

8- Make a casserole that won’t turn out like your mother’s and give it to the neighbors.

7- Grind it up and use it to plug all the little holes in the wall where the kids keep missing the dartboard.

6- Sprinkle generously with fresh ground pepper and spread around the house perimeter to deter those cats that are always throwing up on your doorstep.

5- Put it in a zip bag, freeze it, forget it’s there and then pull it out eight months from now and play a family game called “What the hell is this?”.

4- Send it home with your in-laws with a little card that says “Season’s Greetings and Happy Food Poisoning”.

3- Set pieces of it outside to sun-dry and then use it to patch the kids’ shoes.

2- Use it to start a food fight.

And lastly, the number one thing you can do with leftover turkey….

Serve it again at Christmas!!! Just flick off all the fuzzy purple spots and re-heat. {{OvO}}

ethan holmes moldy leftovers

Ethan Holmes wishes you all a happy holiday season and the hope that you avoid serious injury while battling your fellow shoppers. And if you don’t like my suggestions may you finally figure out what to do with all that leftover Thanksgiving turkey.

Ethan Holmes is the author of Live Your Life in a Crap Free Zone, Earth’s Blood, The Keystone, Shorts and Other Laundry and A Multi-Pack of Brain Flakes.

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About Ethan Holmes

Ethan Holmes currently resides in Northern Arizona and he is the author of five published books; Earth's Blood, The Keystone, A Multi-Pack of Brain Flakes, Shorts and Other Laundry and Live Your Life In A Crap Free Zone. When he is not writing Ethan is also a professional freelance nature photographer.
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